I had over 6 and a half hours’ sleep last night, I slept through till almost 6 o’clock. Went to pilates last night, I’m aching in a few places now because it’s the first time I’ve done it properly for a month, but my bum was fine. And I got some new meditation CDs yesterday through the post. Feeling a lot more cheerful this morning.
Funny – or maybe not so funny – how often that happens, how a particularly sad and grim outburst is followed by something much more positive. Not so funny, because, when you’ve hit the bottom, how can you go anywhere but up? Ah, but when you’re at the bottom, you don’t necessarily know that it’s the bottom, you might feel that you are only half way down and that things will keep going down indefinitely, or will hit a plateau – or should that be a valley? – no a ledge – and keep bouncing along at the same level.
Well, cautious optimism today, because optimism always has to be cautious because we never know what life has in store, but the world does seem a little brighter.
Well, having said that, what else can I say? What is so interesting as misery?
The words have gone, dried up, run away. I’m less than half way to my target, and I don’t know what to talk about. Why do I say ‘talk’ and not ‘write’? I use that kind of language a lot, that auditory imagery (if that makes sense – is ‘imagery’ the right word there?) In neuro-linguistic programming, the kind of words you use is supposed to be significant of different types of personality – I don’t know much about it, only had a couple of introductory days, and I know a lot of people think it’s mumbo-jumbo. I’d never noticed before that I use that sort of language. It’s hard to recognise it in yourself because immediately you become self-conscious about it, how do you know whether that is really how you think or just what you’re saying at that time? But maybe I’ll look up what it’s supposed to signify – if I get time, which I shouldn’t really, because I need to get on with work. I haven’t achieved much over the last two days, too easily distracted. I’m still messing with this website, haven’t got beyond the first page, dithering between Front Page and Dreamweaver, yesterday I couldn’t get an image to display and I had no idea what the problem was, it drove me nuts
Well, back to NLP, or not. I think maybe my use of auditory imagery is just to do with blogging, because blogging feels to me like a conversation, so it seems like a natural form of description to use.
To anyone reading this who remembers Trolly (Guin), I had a message from her yesterday on Facebook. She is getting two kittens (can’t think why she thought I would be interested in knowing that!), and is starting a part-time MA in creative writing in September. We’ve only met in person once, but used to chat a lot on Facebook at one time.
Well, that’s my quota done. No deep thoughts today.