Sunday morning in the rain. What to say? Well, I didn’t get the job. So what happens now? More of the same, I guess. Back in the stuck place. Can’t afford to move out, so there’s nothing I can do. Just have to keep on as I am, making the best of it, telling myself it’s not so bad really, trying to look on the bright side and count my blessings.
Nobody has a prefect life, do they? Not many people get what they want out of life, why should I be one of the lucky ones?
Something else might turn up, I have no idea what, I never know what, things do appear out of the blue. Sometimes. You never know, maybe something else will. Because I don’t see how I can make anything happen.
So, Sunday in the rain. I should have cleaned the pump on the fountain yesterday, won’t be much fun doing it today. And I’ve got the hoovering to do and my writing assignment, because I don’t want to leave it till Monday morning again. And then there’s loads and loads of work that needs to be done, there always is, I’m always behind, never catch up. I should have another go at that thing for Yves, but there are also two sets of minutes, one of which definitely needs to be done, and I should check dates for correspondence that needs to be done in case I miss anything. Oh, and my homework for college for Tuesday. And take the email addresses out of the mag and send it to the lady who does the website.
This is a crazy life but it’s my life, I don’t know what else to do about it, just keep on chasing my tail or try to get more organised and efficient so I’m not always behind with everything or give in and say ‘right, that’s it, no more, I’ll just go back to being completely dependent on Hubby and won’t try to do anything’.
I just wish there was one bit of my life that was OK, that I was satisfied with. But, as a counsellor once told me ‘If wishes were horses, beggars would ride’. There’s no point in wishing. Life is as it is and that’s all there is to it.
At least now I didn’t get the job I might be able to go to Berlin. But I haven’t heard any more about that for ages. So I don’t know what, if anything, is going to happen. I did the first bit of work but I haven’t had any feedback
I should really smarten up my own website, but I don’t know what to do with it. Oh, god. I must do a good job with the work for Yves, maybe he’ll send me some more if I do, but who knows? Whoever knows what is going to come from where? And in the meantime, I just have to keep on with the parish councils and the schools and the magazine and hope for the best.